If I’m being honest a big reason I started this blog was because a friend (who runs a blog of their own) suggested starting one because of all the money they make off of it.
At the time I was working a job that, although in other people’s eyes seemed rewarding, to me was menial, tedious and laborious. Frankly, I was burnt out. Clearly all the wrong reasons for starting a blog. Don’t get me wrong, I love working a real-time job and getting some quality time with my coworkers (I sincerely do), however I was trying to find a new path in life so I could quit my daytime job and focus on the Petite Pepper.
I became so stressed with trying to buy things and market them that I lost sight of why I even started Petite Pepper in the first place, which was to help other petite women find outfits that worked for them (as well as make the world a prettier more fashionable place)
If someone where to pin a word on me it would be tenacious. I keep searching and searching for a solution long after someone has given up on finding one. Therefore Petite Pepper was fun in the beginning because I was on a mission to find petite friendly clothes. But pretty soon my funds began to dwindle and I was under so much pressure to publish posts and make money that it began to feel like work again….and then I got pregnant.
A big part of the reason I didn’t blog while I was pregnant was because I felt so unattractive and I had difficulty dealing with my changing body. I can’t even begin to count how many times I cried when things wouldn’t fit anymore. In fact, the day my jeans popped, and by popped I mean the button literally popped off, I was devastated.
I’ve long been self conscious of my too short legs and non existent abs so showcasing my changing body was just not something I was okay with.
As cliche as this sounds, since I became a mother I’ve just learned to embrace the body I’m in. It’s always changing and evolving and I’m finally okay with that. Not to say that I am letting myself go,but that I have realized my body will never be the way it was before before having my baby. I have more curves now and yes, maybe I’m a little softer, but those are just some of the things that make the new me that much more interesting!
I’ve been trying too hard to make money, and not having any fun with it. And it shows. Looking back on previous blog posts I cringe when reading my published posts as well as any that are unpublished. They sound so fake, so not Susan. So from here on out, I will try my hardest to embrace my body, rolls and all, and document my journey towards my even better post pregnancy body.
So, I’m changing the direction of my blog, this blog will focus on my life as a woman, mother, gym go-er, cook, and petite fashionista and any other title that gets thrown my way.
I hope you guys follow along because I promise things will be different, more honest and probably a lot more fun, from here on out!